I truly never thought this day would come. I’ve said “I just want a one year old” or “I just want to make it to his first birthday” about a thousand times this past year.

I started planning Liam’s first birthday months before the big day. I ordered a cake, picked out decor, bought presents, and organized catering. I was so ready for Liam’s big first birthday spectacular. He passed away the month before his birthday. Calling and canceling everything was hard. It made me feel like an even bigger failure as a parent.

I didn’t start planning Carson’s birthday until recently. As in two weeks ago recently… mainly out of fear that I would plan another birthday and have to turn around and cancel it. Even if we had planned a big party, it would have been canceled because of the global pandemic.

Unlike most people, I am happier we are under a stay-at-home order for Carson’s birthday. We all know he won’t remember this one. A big party would have been fun, but it also would have been extremely stressful. This is a HUGE milestone for my little family, a day we never thought would come. Maybe it is a little selfish, but I am happy that I could cherish Carson’s birthday and not be overwhelmed by playing hostess.

Before all of this crazy happened one of my sweet MOPS friends, Janelle, offered to throw Carson’s birthday party. She decided on a construction theme and bought some adorable decorations. When we found out about the stay-at-home order I decided to stick with the construction theme. Our home is a construction zone already and Carson loves to destroy things. I bought a few more decorations and was beyond relieved that they arrived in time. Thank you, Amazon!

Carson’s morning started with birthday snuggles in bed. I finished putting together his birthday cake while Carson ate his usual first breakfast, berries! Then we packed up to head to our home. While we were trying to scramble out the door, Remi decided she wanted to try some of Carson’s cake. eye roll. It took a bit of time to repair the damage she did and by the time we finally left it was Carson’s nap time.

The background turned out exactly how I imagined it! All of Carson’s tools were just perfect. We did a quick photoshoot and then let him tear into the cake. The cake smash was much more uneventful than I expected. Carson was not interested in actually smashing anything, he just wanted to play in the frosting. Maybe next year it’ll be more fun!

After cleaning up the cake smash mess we drove back to Breckenridge. The weather was perfect for a bike ride. Carson’s birthday gift from us was a Thule child bike seat. It mounts to the back of Will’s bike and Carson loves it!

After dinner we FaceTimed Nana & Grandad, aka my Mom & Dad. They helped us sing Happy Birthday and watched Carson open his presents. We did things a little out of order, therefore I had to improvise with a second cake. Carson loves avocado! I shaped one into a rose and stuck a candle in it. I should have just started with an avocado cake because Carson had a blast smooshing it! He was a tad overwhelmed with everyone singing Happy Birthday but he warmed up to Nana quickly and was giving her kisses, as always.